In a recent conversation, someone said to me, "How can you feel connected to so many people? I mean you even talk to strangers in an airport. Isn't that kind of fake?" I have been thinking about that comment. And the answer is, "I don't know"...
You see, I do feel connected in a weird kind of way with people I know only casually. Yet, I am not what you would call social. Entertaining is not something we do often or easily. Though I am more used to being alone than in a crowd, still I am always interested in what is happening in others' lives. Part of what I miss about working is the daily chat among colleagues. (It's certainly not the pendulum swing of philosophies, nor is it the dark specter of financial disaster served up as a daily cautionary tale)
And friendships do change as lives do. If you are thrown into intimacy every day for a period of decades with someone, of course you grow to feel bonded with that person. Once that immediacy is severed, it is harder to find that link. And yet it is still there, just waiting like a smoldering ember to be kindled when you stir the fire.
I guess I view almost every personas a potential friend. Doesn't everyone have the same basic feelings and yearn for the same human connections that I do....It's the throwing the "pebble in the pond" metaphor that calls me. Eventually any small action that we do may ripple out and touch others. At church recently the word "Ubuntu" is posted on the wall of the sanctuary. I understand from our pastor that it means something like "as I participate, as I share, so I validate my existence."
As our lives get busier-with grandkids and jobs and the juggling of multiple responsibilities-friendships may take different shapes but I am still waiting for that best friend, I guess, who lives down the block and pops in at random times, ignoring the mess, to plop her elbows on my kitchen table and spend an hour or two chatting.
What about you?
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